The Reality Of Modern Dating

  • Aug 19, 2023
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The Reality Of Modern Dating

Today I want to talk about modern dating. 

And no, this is not a loser post about being angry at women. 

This is a post about recognizing that the world has changed and that you need to adapt or get left behind.

Pointing fingers at women and being a victim is not what this is about. 

Sure, women do things that men dont like, but that’s always been the case. 

However, women get influenced by their environment and that is an important part of this article.

Women are very sensitive and will take advantage of opportunities their environment presents.

But the point of this article is to help men that are struggling.

A lot of men are having challenges with women and dating and I’m here to provide you with some guidelines to overcome the obstacles and win.

The Reality Of Modern Dating

A lot of men get frustrated with being rejected by beautiful women.

But to understand what is happening you have to zoom out and see the bigger picture of the modern world

Beautiful women in big cities are now, directly and indirectly, offered sex more than 1,000 times a month by men online, and within their social circles.

If a woman has a basic online profile, spends time on social media, and goes out twice a week, I guarantee that she is offered more sex than the most famous women a hundred years ago.

This is the nature of the new world we live in.

But the reality is that most women are not interested in 99% of the men who want to sleep with them.

But put yourself in her shoes.

Try to imagine the effect on your psychology if 1000 beautiful women a month were trying to sleep with you. 

What kind of man would you turn into?

What would I be like if I were getting over 1,000 offers every month to sleep with a woman?: 

I would probably become arrogant, thinking that I deserved all those girls just because I existed. 

I would flake on women and cancel dates often because I’d constantly be unsure whether I was getting the “best” possible woman. 

I’d be even more arrogant to women who didn’t read my mind and failed to reach my high standards because they wouldn’t know that I could sleep with hundreds of other girls any time I wanted. 

I would always be in a mood and would get dependent on the reactions I get from women. 

If I received less attention one night than usual, I would probably throw a temper tantrum and demand that things change immediately. 

I would get bored easily. 

With so many women constantly trying to get my attention, I wouldn’t tolerate 10 minutes with a boring woman who didn’t jump through hoops to make me happy. 

Lastly, I would be conditioned to value novelty more than stability. 

I would become addicted to meeting more new and beautiful women.

I would be convinced that excitement and fun were worth more to me than stability and commitment. 

My attention span would morph into that of a three-year-old child.

This fictional view of myself is how most modern Western women have been programmed to see themselves.

Yes, not all women, but unfortunetly a lot of them.

The Modern Environment

Yes, a large part of who we are is shaped by our genetics, but dont underestimate the role our environment plays.

Our environment plays a huge role in who we become.

It conditions us the be a person that acts in a certain way.

And when your environment is one where you get nonstop attention from thousands of people trying to sleep with you, your personality and even your humanity will become damaged.

The level of damage will make it hard for you to connect meaningfully with any person you meet.

The Current State Of Dating And Relationships

Trying to find a lasting relationship with a modern woman with comfort and stability is getting harder and harder.

Many modern men have the experience of losing a woman’s attention in a bar or party and then 5 minutes later seeing her get approached by another guy.

Even in small towns and cities, women get hit on a lot.

I know beautiful women from around the world that tell me how many messages they get on Instagram, Twitter, and other online platforms like Tinder.

You must understand the huge impact the Internet has had on a women’s worldview.

Beautiful women have always had abundance but now it’s on a scale that most men dont understand.

But the biggest impact is on average and below average women which totally transformed the way these types of women see themselves.

Understand that before the internet average women and below-average women got little or very little attention from men for obvious reasons.

But now with Photoshop and filters, they have got the weapons to get a lot of attention by creating fake online profiles.

Unfortunately, this high level of attention has created a distorted understanding of their own value.

For example,a real-life 6 might start believing she’s a 10 because she gets 500 likes on her Instagram picture.

I’m not saying this to insult any woman personally, I’m just giving you an honest assessment of the modern dating world.

You must understand that the number of dating choices a woman has created a world where you have to adapt your dating game based on this reality.

You either adapt, or you lose.

Realizing that a woman getting bombarded with attention through likes and direct messages makes it more challenging to play the game with an outdated strategy.

Understand that modern women have become so used to having an abundance of choice in men that they believe that it has always been this way.

They are blissfully unaware that just a few generations ago, they would’ve been lucky to meet 5 good men in a year.

As I mentioned before most of this abundance of choice is a result of the internet and other technology, which allows women to “meet” more men in one day for sex than they could have in any other time in history.

The reality is that technology is continuing to advance rapidly so the chances of things changing to a more even playing field is not good.

Soon it will only be impossible for a man to meet women for a date if he has a dating strategy that is smarter than the average man.

The Good News

The positives are that we can overcome this reality by being smart and using technology to our advantage.

The other positive is that there are still a lot of beautiful women to meet out there.

However, you must realize that the average woman has a lot more choice than the average man.

Because they have more choice than you, it allows them to demand men of the highest value even if their understanding of reality is distorted.

Since we don’t have the power to change this reality of the modern world we must become smarter to win and turn the tables.

We must sidestep the negatives while maximizing the benefits of the modern world.

And lastly, we must embrace our ancient strength, masculinity.

Whatever Your Opinion Of Game, You Need It

A lot of people who criticize game dont realize that they already have game, but unfortunetly it’s a very bad game unconsciously learned through bad mental conditioning and the environment they grew up in.

But what exactly is Game?

Game is a range of beliefs, behaviors, strategies, and tactics that make people around you react to you in a specific way.

And when it comes to women to has the effect of them being more attracted to you while increasing your likelihood of seeing her again or sleeping with her. 

One form of Game is cold-approaching.

Cold approach is an direct strategy.

It’s as simple as it sounds, cold.

You walk up to a girl you don’t know at all and introduce yourself in the best possible way.

Then she gets to decide if your first impressions were good enough to continue your interaction or not.

Game is also very practical on women in your social circle.

However, you must adapt your strategy and take a more passive approach.

You have to be less aggressive.

Being more passive in your group will give you a soft landing if you are rejected and you can then just brush it off as friendly banter.

But cold approach will be your main game strategy.

And with cold approach it doesn’t matter if you are rejected twenty times a day, because you probably won’t ever see those women again.

But when gaming within a specific social circle a passive strategy is best.

Within one social circle don’t game more than one or two girls at the same time to minimize conflict and drama.

The Misconception Of Game

The biggest misconception about game is that it’s simply a collection of pick-up lines.

People think it’s just a guy who walks up to a woman and says something cheesy while wearing a stupid hat. 

The reality is that game is a lifestyle.

Game has evolved into a holistic strategy of changing your mindset, appearance, behavior, and life habits. 

Game is an exercise in personal development.

Sure, most new guys start off with the help of some lines to help them build confidence, but for most, it evolves into an all-around life transformation.

The Game Must Adapt

As I mentioned earlier the world has changed and change is happening faster and faster.

Therefore you must be able to adapt.

The good news is the fundamentals stay the same.

But small changes in strategy and tactics are required.

I have previously written about Game,so Im not going to go into details of Game but I will give you 3 guidelines to follow to improve your dating life in the modern world.

3 Guidelines

Become A Mindset Master – Build Super Confidence

It’s kind of a cliche in the personal development world to tell people to improve their self-confidence. 

But some cliches are cliches for a reason. 

And when it comes to women and dating confidence is worth its weight in gold. 

Understand that most women meet men that are average or low in confidence, so when she meets a super-confident man she immediately takes notice and moves the needle in the game of attraction.

So you need to work on building your confidence. 

If you are low in confidence right now then learn to fake it till you make it.

Use this method as training wheels on a bicycle that will eventually disappear as you naturally develop confidence through practice and hard work. 

Your masculine frame will be the foundation of your success as a man on all levels.

Fortune Favors The Bold -Step Into Fear Consistently

Feeling fear is natural but how you react to it is a choice. 

This links up with confidence.

However even as a confident man fear will confront you in certain situations.

And different men will have different levels of fear.

Therefore you must learn to step into fear consistently.

You must learn to manage fear and ironically start to enjoy overcoming the fear response.

Learn And Understand Female Psychology

Most men dont realize that alpha males think and act more like a woman than a man when it comes to seduction. 

He understands female psychology and uses it to shatter their defenses.

In order to get to this level, you need to study female psychology and the art of seduction.

Yes, some men have a natural understanding of women depending on the type of environment they grew up in.

But for most men, it does not come naturally, they need to read a few books and learn.

You will then realize that most men have no idea about what they are doing when it comes to women.

They don’t know what women want.

They have almost zero understanding of female psychology and this is why they lose.

It’s also the reason why millions of men get dumped or end up in divorce.

Become Like Water – Master Modern Social Media Platforms


Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.” 

-Bruce Lee


I mentioned earlier the importance of the ability to adapt you must have this ability when it comes to social media platforms.

You must learn how to use platforms like Instagram to your advantage.

Don’t just reject it, master it and use it to reach your objectives.


The modern world is more challenging for men, but at the same time, there has never been more opportunity to meet and date beautiful women at the same time. 

Yes, we have challenges but we have the tools to overcome them and still have a great time on this planet. 

But you have to do the work and then you will be rewarded. 

So dont fall for all the negativity and fear out there. 

Go after the light and win.

Disclaimer: This story is auto-aggregated by a computer program and has not been created or edited by menshealthfits.
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