Today’s conversation is one that I think we could all use some help with. How to Handle Relationship Conflict in Your Partnership.

Anyone who watches my videos and reads my posts knows how important I think communication is within a partnership. If you have a communicative connection as a couple, you will always be able to solve conflict quickly and maturely. We all argue and have some disagreements in our relationships, but understanding how to learn from them, and move past the problem, is the key to having a great partnership.

#1 – The first thing that has to happen is that you both need to own your mistakes and not point the blame at your partner.

When you learn how to use the word “I” instead of saying “you,” when trying to get your point across, it lessens the blame directed at your partner. When you make a statement saying: “I feel sad when we argue, and I would like to find a way that we can both compromise to fix this problem. I am sorry for my part in this situation, and I respect your opinion and hear what you’re saying. I hope that you also understand my point of view.”

Implementing this cultured way of handling an intense argument, may sound easier said than done, but with a little practice and seeing how quickly this format defuses the heated discussion, you will both learn how to adapt to using this method when dealing with future conflict.

Blaming your partner, without taking any ownership of the part you played in the problem, will only cause ongoing issues between you as a couple. It adds more fuel to the fire that’s already burning! It gets pretty old always having to be right, and you end up having a one-sided argument that never gets rectified. This causes a built-up resentment that can be difficult to come back from.

#2 – The Second thing that should be adhered to, is to hear what your partner is saying, respect their opinion, and vice versa.

You are both entitled to have a viewpoint. Hearing each other out and really listening to one another shows you respect them and value their opinion. It doesn’t mean that you have to agree with everything that is said, but acknowledging their point shows you are open to hearing their concerns and ideas. Sometimes their take on things might be a better option and can offer a different insight that you never thought of before. The same could be said for implementing your personal feelings. We all want to feel validated by our partners.

It is always important to remember that being in a committed partnership means working as a couple and finding healthy solutions together as a team.

Dear Sybersue

Photo by Ketut Subiyanto

#3 – The third process when dealing with relationship conflict, is to be able to apologize to each other and not hold onto a disagreement without resolving it.

If you don’t find a constructive way to deal with an argument in your partnership, you will continue to have repeated issues that keep resurfacing. Being able to apologize to each other goes a long way in maintaining healthy longevity in your relationship.

Being stubborn and placing blame on your partner is a big catalyst and reason for why many breakups occur. There always has to be some compromise in any disagreement, because you and your partner will not always be on board with having the same opinion about everything. This is what makes us unique as human beings.

Having separate opinions can also make you look at things in a more open-minded way and give you a different perspective once in a while. This is another reason why hearing what your partner has to say is so beneficial. They not only feel heard and validated, but you will have a new outlook to think about as well. This is a win/win situation!

Ignoring your partner’s point of view and not listening or accepting what they have to say, continually causes the relationship walls to crumble down a little more with each scenario that doesn’t get resolved. This is why it is imperative to be on a similar page when it comes to most things early on in your partnership.

Seeing eye-to-eye whenever possible, respecting each other’s feelings, and understanding the need for making small changes, will always keep you closely connected as a couple. It is OK to be wrong and apologize when you make mistakes in your relationship. No one is perfect, and we are all finding our way as we evolve in our lives. That is a part of the growth that we all experience, and respecting our loved ones and owning our faults is another big part of that learning curve.

Please watch the video below for more information on today’s discussion.

Sybersue xo <3

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